Today is the last day of my week off from school. When I go back to school tomorrow, there will be about two months until I get out of school on 23 April, and another month of exams until I graduate around the same time in May. How did that happen? How did my last year of high school just fly by like that?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m actually glad that it did. I wanted my junior year (last year) to pass as slowly as possible, because most of my friends were graduating at the end of that year, but now that it’s my last year and so many of my friends are gone, I just can’t wait for it to be over.

It just hit me yesterday that I need to start thinking about things like prom and graduation. My mom made a hair appointment for me on 21 March, which is fine because I usually just get hair cuts when I feel like it, and I don’t get them often. My last one was probably back in November or December. However, I realized that a little under five weeks after that hair appointment is prom. I think prom is on 27 April. That means I’ll probably have to get another haircut just before prom, and another again in a month for graduation. Suddenly I have to plan my haircuts around these events, and it makes them seem so near. I guess they are; it’s surreal.

Due to this, I’ve suddenly begun to worry about finding a dress for prom. Right now, I really can’t be bothered to look for a prom dress, and I definitely can’t be bothered to pay for one! I am accustomed to going through life by taking one thing at a time and not really planning ahead. I know I can’t wait ’til the last minute to get a prom dress though, or they will all be picked over. I’m just not mentally ready to start looking yet.

When I think about that, it makes me not really want to go to prom. I think as a senior I’m expected to go, but I’m not sure if I want to live up to that expectation. It’s just another dance. It’s a more expensive, fancier dance, but it’s just another dance. I don’t even like dances that much, and why should I pay somewhere around $100 for a dress that I will only wear once? It’s not like it’s a wedding dress. I would go all out for something like that. It’s only prom.

I just looked up prom on Wikipedia, and the page reminded me of corsages. That’s another thing about prom, the girls are expected to give their dates boutonnieres to wear on their lapels, and in return they receive corsages. Why? The guys take off their jackets once they go into the dance hall anyway, and I personally really dislike corsages. I don’t understand the concept of wearing a flower on your wrist. I’ve worn corsages before in other, non-dance environments, and I find them extremely uncomfortable, not to mention unwieldy. Why am I expected to wear a corsage? Why am I expected to even GO TO PROM? Why is there such social stigma surrounding it?

For some reason, it actually brings me near tears thinking about it all. Maybe it’s the fact that high school is coming to an end, but I think it’s just prom. As of tonight, I don’t want to go.